We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
You should try cooking mac & cheese naked sometime. It's quite relaxing.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Randomize
