I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
She just spat tequila at me... Like a fountain... A broken fountain
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Why the fuck is there a goat in the kitchen
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
Randomize
