Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
That's intense
I really hope your girlfriend didnt have your phone while i texted how much i loved doing it in HER car with you :x
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
Randomize