i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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