Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
When people ask about my bruises, I'm just going to say it was a doorknob. Or possibly a group of doorknobs. Angry doorknobs.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Gay?
German.
Pity.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
Randomize
