It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
And now you understand the importance of Saturday naps.
Because you stay up all night having sex and eating sushi?
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
Randomize
