Fine. I'll sleep in my office
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
But you've got to admit , for how blackout I was I look fucking unreal in those pictures
Who wouldn't want a man who can knock a guy out but also loves the bachelor.
It's the best of both worlds
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
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