I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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