It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
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