Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
Get dressed up for her? please, I could shit my pants and she would still blow me
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
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