I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just call Katie. She's like the drunk whisperer; she can get them to do anything.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
