Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
Randomize
