so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
You sent me a snapchat of you hugging a beer with the caption "best friend"
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize