Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
it seems as if every mistake i've ever made in life i've had an errection in one hand and a bud light in the other
I just went in my fridge and said to my turkey "see you thursday". I seriously have issues
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
You left your underwear on the fireplace
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
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