Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Me. At least after what I've been through.
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
Drunk walkin through police station. America
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Had sex with him again...yikes. and the whole time he kept saying "i wish we could do this forever." Forever lasted about 45 seconds
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
