they need to just BURY HIM!
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
We got to the hotel at 12AM with nothing but a plastic bag of magnum condoms and lube, while wearing glow sticks. The receptionist handed us a bunch of water bottles and said "These are on us.", not even phased by three dudes about to have a threesome. I love this town.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
Randomize
