whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
You screamed out "happy birthday Jesus" followed by chugging Bacardi straight out the bottle
Randomize
