i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
I'm to the point of desperation where I stare at customers penis imprints through their pants all day
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Why was I so drunk last night that I licked the bar and then the bartenders face? Why didn't you stop me? We can never go back there.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
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