At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I thought it went well, but he just sent me a video of me sucking an icicle on the fire escape of his building with the caption "The ice got more than I did." Somehow I feel like I owe him a blowjob.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
We're gonna be late. Scott went too far predrinking amd tried pierce his own lip with a poptab. Save me a beer, i'm gonna need it.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
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