I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
So feel off my bed lastnight into the trashcan. On the plus side i thought under my bed was a cave and i went exsploring
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Floor bacon is actually really good
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
