why do all the strippers look like they came from fraggle rock
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
Gotta wait until my full time offer is confirmed before I try to fuck the mid level manager
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
Randomize
