we have pet lesbian snakes
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
He just knocked over the beer pong table... I haven't seen so much fail in one room since I watched "Mall Cop" with my grandma
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I know it's my dream I got hurt enough to leave work but not hurt enough to stop drinking
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Randomize
