That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Randomize