I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Seriously. Are we going out tonight? If we're not, I'm going to put on sweatpants and do drugs.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
