the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Randomize
