Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
you mean i was at the winter classic?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Shaving your bikini line at 11 at night in the Walmart bathroom feels trashy no matter why you're doing it.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Randomize
