I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
It's a beautiful day for a hangover
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Is it bad to get into the ocean at night? i always thought sharks hated the smell of vomit after drinking
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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