Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
Lost my credit card. M has a bottle of blood in her pocket from a hobo.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
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