i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
he's making romantic advances towards me. and he has a pet snake. 2nd part not relevant, but interesting.
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
My google history for last night included "Whre is johns house" and "wher can i buy nukes?" Pretty sure they're related to one another.
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
They both showed up at the same time... to surprise me. One had flowers and the other had chocolates. Needless to say, I will be at the bar all weekend long trying to figure out how this happens.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize
