Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
After the baby comes, I'll make us White Russians with my breast milk. That will teach her about sharing.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
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