I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
he took off my shirt and said 'oh my god the legends are true'
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I fucked her to her "thinking of him" playlist. Sucks to be that guy haha
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
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