I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
I just saw a dude get out of an ambulance with nothing but wallabees on
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
i came home to her naked eating chilli on the living room floor. Stop giving her jager.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
