I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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