Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
Awkward interaction of the day: Staring at some guy trying out if he is or is not the guy that woke me up yesterday by getting arrested in front of my apartment.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
Don't make this awkward for me. Don't let your mom come near the bathroom. I can't meet your mom for the first time while I'm shitting. Dont make this awkward.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Dude. Went to buy some jack and sailor Jerry, when the guy at the counter realized it was my birthday everybody in the store including the stoners and the elderly sang to me. Then they gave me shots of moonshine. 21st bday was a success
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
there's a bowling ball in the dishwasher and a dog bone in the freezer
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