Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
Omg last night I was giving shots out like I was the Willy Wonka of the alcohol world.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
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