I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
