you went up to their shower, tripped in it, accidentally turned it on and then claimed that you like to "test everyone's showers"
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Yea we had fun. Lost my wallet some girl has it. Sarah fell asleep in a cab and ended up at some wawa. It was cray. She's home now
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
why is there a thong in the fridge-NOT MINE-and a half of a pickle on the stairs?!
I don't wear thongs. The picle was for dipping. Ill explain later. Lacy or plain thong ?
Just blew on a shot of whiskey to cool it off, like it was soup...
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