Did I tell you he has dinosaur sheets?
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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