Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
'go have sex with her' ddoes not count as wingman
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize