So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
his prince albert piercing just severely cut the roof of my mouth. can you pick me up at the hospital if he drops me off?
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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