Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
The text I got from my boyfriend this morning: "babe, I'm not mad because I know you were drunk, but you kissed 3 guys last night and I wasn't one of them".
Randomize
