So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Abby. I can text perfectly. I pledge allegiance to the flag of the united states of america. and to the republic, for which we stand, one nation under god indivisible and with liberty and justice for all god bless america
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
