time to smoke my breakfast
i can't believe i brushed your teeth last night. so drunk.
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize
