I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
