its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
finally nailed that neighbor chick. hopefully i can get her wireless password now. free internet trumps moral standards any day
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
Randomize
