margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
he'll eat me out, but god forbid we double dip when sharing salsa
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
Randomize
