She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize