he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
How long do I have to listen to him talk about the chickens before telling him I just really want to fuck? Note: it's already been twelve minutes.
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