i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize
