you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
You need Xanax blowdarts
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Randomize
